so, i finally broke down and purchased some kfc grilled chicken. i wanted to wait until the whole oprah coupon hysteria wore off. honestly, kfc doesn't do it for me anymore. i always feel a little sick after eating it. the best thing they have going is the cole slaw and the wedges.anyhoo...i've been working out again, and i needed a quick meal, that wouldn't defeat the whole purpose of working out. i decided to give the grilled chicken a try. oh, and the other thing, besides getting a little sick that bothers me about kfc, is the price. you can easily spend ten bucks if you actually want a side dish and a soda. i'm a grown man. i can't do anything with a two piece, so i always end up spending more.
i was excited when i saw that they had a two piece, two sides plus a drink combo for $4.99. at kfc, that price is like a clearance sale. i decided that a two piece would do, i just needed a snack to hold me over until i was ready to cook dinner. i ordered and the cashier screams, "that will be $6.11." i am no good in math, but i know that sounded a bit much for a meal that was only $4.99.
i was on the phone with michelle, and told her that i was gonna have to hang up so i could have a word with boonquita when i pulled up to the register. yes, i know naming the cashier boonquita is rude. i am not a perfect man. anyway, i ask boonquita what the tax was on the meal, and all she did was continue to say $6.11.
this was going to be harder than i thought. all of a sudden, cooking at home seemed like a better option. i explained that there was a combo for $4.99 and that i didn't understand how the price was now $6.11. boonquita says and i quote, 'i just rings it up how you say it.'
mmmkay...
she then says, "$6.11" again. i breathe and tell her that i'd prefer to pay $4.99, as opposed to paying for items individually. at this point, boonquita is at a crossroads. i see it in her eyes. she wants to curse me out, but it's a recession. jobs are hard to come by. instead of going off, she rings up the meal again and says to a co-worker about me, 'i can't read your damn mind.'
now all of a sudden i am at a crossroads, because i want to put the car in park and climb into the drive-thru window. instead i sit there and wonder where things went wrong between me and boonquita. by the time i get my change and my food, i am hot. i don't like people stealing. i had friends in high school who would charge more for meals at burger king and not add the extra money to the register. they'd divide the extra money at the end of the night. i don't know if boonquita was doing that, but it crossed my mind. on top of that, i'm like, nobody's asking you to read minds. it's a pretty straight-forward transaction.
by the time i get home, i already hate the grilled chicken. it's all boonquita's fault. after a moment, i settle down and take my first bite.
damn.
that chicken was good as hell. it was the best fast food chicken i've ever had. i was so excited, i began texting friends. they were all skeptical. i tell them that i was too, but to give it a try. i got a text last night from my girl benita and she loved it. all of a sudden boonquita doesn't even matter.
then, randy bandit tells me that "tests of the new grilled chicken revealed substantial amounts of a carcinogenic chemical in all samples tested." Damn. What to do? What to do?
it's always something.


